What Would You Do If You Were In My Shoes?

           

             We sat down, on the cold hard floor, desperately trying to "mug" for the upcoming O'levels Examination. Clearly, i could not focus because of her.( "Her"? Oh well, its just my crush for the past 8 years or so.) I was in a dilemma, confused whether i should express my oppressing feelings for her. She sat there, looking around, fumbling with her phone, messing with her ruler (.....), not focusing as well, due to having a short attention span. "This isn't productive learning!" She said. I kept myself mum. I wanted to step in, just giving her some work or clarifying some doubts she have about the Physics subject, but i was afraid. I fear that such trivial act would arouse suspicion in her, indirectly allowing her to think (or know) that i'm actually fond of her. I fear that such, would shun her away from me, that i would lose a friend just like that.
                                      We walked down the route to the train station, her with her earpiece on. I decided to initiate. "So, anyone invited you out for prom?" She looked forward, not giving me a single glance and replied, "I don't get why boys ask girls out for prom. I mean, its just a dinner right?" (*That is literally not answering my question). I didn't react in any way, just walk as per usual...
            Me,being a gentleman, decided to walk her home, since we lived just a stone's throw away from each other. Throughout the journey, i tried to talk, but clearly, she wasn't really interested in what i'm saying. One sentence that she said, in particular, pricked my heart. She said, "Haiz.. (sigh). I need someone to motivate me to study." Simple sentence right? NO! I actually felt pain. Well, I was thinking in my very brains, "Wow, i tried to ask you out countless times to study but yet you aren't motivated?" It was at that point in time that i realized that my feelings for her, were too deep. I tried my best but nothing paid off. Basically, my countless efforts weren't enough to at least make a slight impact on her, aka i'm useless in helping her from the very start. Again, i kept mum, while thoughts cycled in my mind.               I told myself that its time i give up. "Let it go!" as the movie Frozen says, I wanted to simply put the pain down and move on, cause apparently, its impossible for us to even start, or i should say, i'm not her cup of tea. However, some place in my heart, the feelings would still reminiscence and the urge to tell her, "Hey i like you" exist...
            Its just 5 more days to my final lap, Os but i'm actually thinking of this matter. Perhaps i should just ask her out for the last time to give her some tips and verbal encouragements. (However, the main question would still be, whether or not her parents would allow her to go out.)To be honest, I would never be able to see her after Os ever again, for various reasons which i don't bother explaining.                    To express my feelings or not to? What would you do if you were in my shoes?                                     

Ideal girl

Hi! I'm kind of random today, so yeah, gonna post a random blog post : P

Today, i'm going to talk about things i see in girls around me. After years in Secondary School, I've developed a weird taste towards gals. Basically, this post is a short sharing of my ideal girl.

I like girls who are, innocent and cute. Don't get me wrong. I'm not a pedophile or some "pervy". I just like it when they are innocent in the mind. When i mention innocent, i don;t expect her to be "mentally clean" (if you know what i mean). What i really hope is that she is 'pure' and treats everyone with love and respect. Girls like that, are just awesome! * Just a no link fetish, i feel that girls with specs that have big frames, like mine, are cute. It makes them look fabulous :)

Moving on, i like girls who can cook/bake. I'm not a guy who enjoys "high quality food". To me, food that taste acceptable is more than enough. So, my ideal girl in the future need not know how to cook super high class food, just edible food will satisfy me.(Other than instant noodles of course X_X). If she tries to cook new stuff, and that new stuff turns out to taste surprisingly awful, i will still compliment her and say GREAT! After all, encouragement will boost her morale!

Plus, i like girls who understands and can communicate with me well. She need not be a super "chio" girl, just one that i can really talk to and one that looks great to me. Basically, i have to be able to look into her eyes and talk to her. Or not, she isn't the one i'm really looking for. 

My ideal girl need not be some smart ass who is super duper capable in the work force. I just need a decent girl, who consistently strives and do her best. That's all i ask for. After all, i don't really want her to stress herself out too much!

My ideal girl has to keep calm and not jump to conclusions that easily. I also hope she doesn't make a fuss and blow up the entire house easily. I really hate that. 

No one is perfect. Perhaps i might not be able to meet such a special girl when i really grow up. What i can do is to hope for it to happen, though its hard. Haha! Anyways, this sums up the entire post. 

GTG. BYE!

CNY review 2014. 下次会更好！

       So peeps, Chinese New Year is finally over ;( How sad! School starts tomorrow. Before that dread even began, let me share some story, or I should say, a review of the Chinese New Year I've spent this year.
       For the first day, 初一, as usual, I get Ang Paos, red packets, from relatives and family members, have lunch at my grandmas home (sumptuous meal :D) and lastly, the "grand finale", going to my distant cousin's house at night. I was kinda anticipating a better experience at my cousins house. Compared to the previous years, this year didn't went as well. (Although they were dressed cutely and prettily. ;) *1) is there even such a word? 2) Not much incest intended..)  There wasn't any "drinks"(random fruits mashed up to form a weird tasting juice) as punishments when we lost in poker games, not much communications with distant cousins, and more... Feels kinda bored.. Plus, I was dragged into watching hunger games 1, which I have completely no idea what the storyline was about as I was drunk. But! I remain awake due to constant "spoiling" of the story by my cousin beside me and the conscious to not let her down. The day basically didn't run well. Hope Next Year's 初一 will be better!
       The second day, 初二, was the day I fell sick. BAD SORE THROAT and I didn't eat any snacks and ba kwa. The day practically was mainstream ttm. Visit maternal grandma, play "Dai Di", leave to 二姨婆's house, go paternal uncles house, play poker, sleep, the end. Kind of boring right, such yearly routine.. But, at least I saw my ah ma, every 初二 night, which kind of saved my day.
       The last day I actually celebrated was 初三. I won $18 man!! From traditional old ah ma game, '四色牌'  some more. It was the first time I was ever in "combat", gambled and poof, money came rolling in. I must be too skillful :P. However, I'm not really into gambling that much, unlike other of my relatives, so yeah, not really that interested in the end results. Just the process of learning how to play is more than enough!
       Overall, this years CNY isn't that interesting after all. Hope that in the future, relatives and cousins can interact with each other more often, rather than being engrossed in their phone's games.. 希望下个新年更好，更有趣 !

冷漠无情？

               我眼中的新加坡是个冷酷无情，国人丝毫没有一点道德心，一点爱心的一个国家。左看右看，大家都以自我为中心，根本都不管他人的死活！

              但有一天，一位善心人让我目睹了他所做的一切，让我再次评估了新加坡纯粹是个缺乏人情味社会的观念。这某人的举动使我重新找回了希望。事情是这样的…

              大约是傍晚六点多钟，天公不做美，突然下起了倾盆大雨，雷声隆隆的。由于是繁忙时段，雨又正下着，大家都纷纷你推我挤的，赶向地铁车站，想尽快回家休息。

              当时，我正坐在巴士车站耐心的等待巴士，也同时静静地观察这些新加坡人的 ‘日常习性’。我心想，”哎！他们怎么就不能有规律的排好队进车站呢？“ 我越想越心寒，但没办法，新加坡人就是这样，没有道德与公德心，就是没有礼让精神！

             想呀想，才忽然发觉一位老阿婆傻乎乎地走到了巴士车站，身子都被大雨淋得像只”落汤鸡“似的。她神情紧张，好像很害怕的样子。

             那位阿婆走向了一位也同样站在巴士站，穿着西装，打着领带的年轻人用着颤抖的手叫了他一声。那位年轻人自高自大，无礼的说：”你要什么” 阿婆回复道：”年轻人啊，我的钱包不见了，没钱搭车回家，你能给我一元的钱搭车吗?” 那位阿婆很诚恳，很有礼的问道。

             等搭巴士的乘客们原本还以为那位年轻人会大发慈悲，把一元钱给那位阿婆，毕竟，以他的穿着来看一元钱对他来说根本不算什么。但大家，包括我，万万没想到，他不仅不给钱，反而还破口大骂道：”你这个骗子，以为装可怜就能骗我的钱？省省吧！没用的!” 他这么一诬赖，有些乘客也信以为真，说道”诈骗集团怎么会请这么一个烂演员呀！哈哈哈！”

             从阿婆的脸上，我能看出她伤心无奈的样子，眼泪就快从眼眶落了下来。我很愤怒，想要站出来帮她时，碰巧一位学生，大约十五岁，从位子上站了起来，走向阿婆。她从钱包里掏出了五元钱，递给了阿婆，还问了她，她家住哪里。听了以后，他耐心的对阿婆说：“阿婆，你在这打车是错的。你应该过对面，乘搭265号巴士，5 个站才会顺利到家。” 接着，他边把手中的雨伞给了那位阿婆。

              这时，其他乘客都目瞪口呆，没想到肯帮阿婆，不停其他人的劝告，竟然是一位中学生。阿婆感激不尽，连忙道谢，说：“谢谢你呀小弟，谢谢你。好人一定会有好报呀!” 那位学生答复，“不客气应该的。”阿婆与学生告别后，那位骄傲自满的年轻人与和他连同诬赖阿婆为骗子的乘客在那瞬间，露出了惭愧，抱歉的表情。

              我走向前，好奇地问那位学生：“你为何在他人都诬赖阿婆的情况下，号是坚决选择帮助阿婆呢?” 他微笑着说：“老师常说，助人为快乐之本，况且那位阿婆没理由只想骗我们一元钱就溜了。所以我判断，这位阿婆应该是真的不见了钱包，没钱打车回家！”

              搭车回家的路上，那位学生说的话，仿佛在我脑海里一直播放着。我非常的高兴与欣慰。高兴在于阿婆终于能顺利到家，欣慰的是，这个我所谓“冷漠”的社会，其实并不那么的冷漠，无情。我意识到，这社会还是有人拥有着爱心与热心待人的态度。这事让我重新评估了以往新加坡社会缺乏人情味的看法。或许要国人有热心，爱心，彼此信任，有着正确的品德，道德观，并不是我一直所想的，不可能！

Dreams!

Dreams

                    I want to be a Hero! An engineer! A scientist! Remember those dreams that you once have while you were young? The excitement and enthusiasm to achieve that goal? Most of the time, our initial passion for our dreams tends to be crushed when someone condemns our ideas, saying that those dreams are simply a futile wish of our own desire and we will never succeed. We were instilled since young that these dreams were impractical and will definitely fail. Gradually, we stop dreaming, stop thinking of what we could have done to succeed, stop trying to be someone we really want to be.

                   Inevitably, when there are dreams, there are bound to be failures. Pursuing after a dream is indeed difficult. However, each time we fail, we learn. Perseverance is the crucial key to success of our dreams. Thomas Edison, had a noble goal, to bring about convenience to the people in the world. Despite approximately three thousand times of failed attempts, he did not succumb to the failures but instead, overcome the obstacle one by one. Eventually, he created the light bulb. Without his dream, his perseverance, we might still be using candles and matches to ignite in the dark. 

   

                  In pursuit of our dreams, we often get criticisms from people around us as they perceived our goals to be impractical. They condemn us, tell us that our dreams are impossible and could never be achieved. Sometimes, we feel insecure and think back doubting whether these dreams could actually be achieved. However, I strongly believe that if we work really hard, achieving our dream is never impossible. If Albert Einstein had listened to his teacher, who constantly calls him slow, insults him as a mentally handicapped child who will never be able to succeed, he will never be able to achieve his dream and become who he was really meant to be, a Scientist, known to the globe till date.

                 When we fail in the quest of hunting our dreams, we should never be too discouraged but rather, set our dreams as the source of motivation to keep us going. Mr Steven Spielberg, a renowned film director had a dream to produce and direct his own movies. However, his movies were once rejected by the University of Southern California, putting his career as well as his dream at danger. Fortunately, after alterations and improvements made on the flaws of his story line, he managed to get his movie approved at the third try. He admitted being discouraged when he failed but shared that his dream was his soul encouragement that spurred him on greatly, constantly motivating him to think of a variety of ways to improve. Currently, he is one of the world’s most prominent movie directors known.

                 With a dream, our life will stay motivated and fruitful, but without it, our life will simply be meaningless and pointless. Have a dream, pursue it to the fullest. Never give up, never be too afraid to try. With that, our dream will eventually succeed!